My Self-care Toolbox


What do you think of when you hear the term "Self-care,"
Spa days, mani-pedis, long vacations, something else?
What's the first thought that comes to your mind when you hear the term "Self-care∘?
how expensisve it is, "That's not in my budget!" "Self-care is just an excuse!" "I can barely afford to live! What in the world makes you think I'm able to afford to indulge in self-care?!" "It's too cookie-cutter. These types of approachs don's fit my needs, lifestyle, etc." "My job doesn't leave much time for self-care, or, at least, not enough to make an impact." "Only someone like Zuckberg can afford self-care!" some form of, "I'm all right! I don't need self-care."
Is there some other thought?

You're probably sitting there thinking "Who the heck is she to talk about SELF-care?! She doesn't know a thing about me or my life, my needs, etc!"
You're right, while I don't know about your life, circumstances, needs, etc, I do know a couple things.
1. I have some of these same thoughts.
2. Cookie-cutter appoaches do not fit every one!
3. I know and understand more than you may think or realize, especially as an advocate for disability rights.


This is why I decided to write about my self-care toolbox (or toolboxes?) and maybe even add a few surprises and ideas!
But, first, we'll lay some groundwork, talking about what self-care is, and can be, and why it's important for advocates to indulge in self-care.


What the heck is self-care anyway?

The World Health Organization's (WHO's) working definition of self-care is:

"The ability of individuals, families and communities to promote health, prevent disease, maintain health, and cope with illness and disability with or without the support of a health-care provider".


What Self-care Can Be

Self-care isn't always about spa days, cruises and long vacations, mani-pedis, and other things of this nature. While it can be about this, it doesn't have to be! It can be something as simple as going for a walk or doing a quick deep-breathing exercise in between calls, grabbing some lunch, spending time virtually or in-person with people you love, or any other number of things! The best part about this, is that unlike a lot of other things in life, self-care can be tailored to you, your lifestyle, circumstances, needs, and so forth. This is another reason why I wanted to approach it from this angle. I wanted to give some ideas to help you build your own self-cste toolbox, or toolboxes.


Now, we come to the $1,000,000 questions. What are the benefits of self-care, and why is it important for advocates to indulge in a little self-care?

Self-care can bring several long and short-term benefits. Some of the short-term benefits include:
• Reduced stress levels
• Increase self-worth and feelings of belonging and love

Some of the long-term benefits you could reap include:
• Reduced stress levels:
Whether we want to admit it or not, life can be and is stressful, and stress loves to attack us on multiple fronts. Whether it's the every day humdrum of life, or increased in workload, or going to war with insurance because of a denial, or any of a laundry list of other circumstances. This can have short and long-term affects, from increased worry and mood changes, to affecting relationships and a higher risk of worsening of existing heabbth conditions, or the development of health conditions.

• Management of chronic health conditions:
When chronic conditions are managed, it allows people to live the lives they want to, and can have ripple-affects across all areas of life.

• Prevention of diseases and chronic conditions:
Remember when I said that stress can have long-term affects, and how one of those could be the worsening were existing conditions or spur their development? When you practice self-care, your stress levels get reduced, and when that happens, your body and mind are very thankful!

• Better relationships:
When you're stressed, have a bad day/week, or anything else is happening, a simple conversation about what to have for dinner, can easily turn into a battlefield. When you practice self-care, no one has to avoid figurative landmines as much.

• Reduction of burnout:
This one is a huge one, no matter what your occupation or disability. Burnout is a very real and serious concern. People in certain professions, such as advocacy are at a heightened risk. For advocates, we face burnout that can be caused by various factors, whether it's due to our disability(ities) or advocacy itself. This makes it paramount for advocates of any kind to practice and implement self-care tools and strategies.


Why Self-care Is Important For Advocates


As I stated, it is paramount of advocates to practice self-care, for many reasons.

This job can and will change you, in more ways than you can ever expect, and in ways you won't realize until later. It will change your mind and psyche, because you will have scars ripped open, and you will have some new scars. Sometimes, the ripping open of old scars, and the making of new/fresh scars, will happen publicly. Some people and their actions can trigger your trauma, and it will feel the affects for a long time afterward. You will and do see, deal with, hear, way more than you should ever have to in this job, whether it's the callousness of policymakers, or abuse and neglect, among other things. You will hear and see things in your head, day and night, especially when you lay your head down to sleep, including the ghosts from your past, the voice of a person on a call you were on whose in desperate need of mental health support, the list is endless. Not everyone will understand, see or appreciate you, what you do, why you do it, the nature of it, or anything else about disability, advocacy, etc. 
This can and will drain your batteries quickly, and lead you to ask yourself a lot of hard questions. Some of those people will be people you are closest to, or some of them may even be people you would expect to, but don't. 
We clean up a lot of emotional and mental vomit as part of our job, sometimes, owe do this even when we're either trying to clean up our own, or when we're vomiting emotionally and mentally. sometimes, we hold people's hair back while this is going on, and sometimes, the emotional and mental vomit gets all over us.
You will come home wearing the emotional and mental gore of your day, and the job. Figuratively speaking, you will get blood on your hands, and it will come from many different sources. Sometimes, it will be very hard and even impossible to wash it off. This job is public service, which means you're always on the clock. This can and does take a toll on you, mentally, emotionally, maybe even physically and spiritually, and you may not realize how much until you've been in it for a while.
This job will push you to the brink mentally and emotionally, it will push you to your breaking point, and even past it at times. You will seriously think about leaving, and might even be driven to form your exit strategy.
You will relive your trauma over and over again, and sometimes, it will be in the public eye, and sometimes it will be at night.

Last but certainly not least, we fight battles on several fronts in several different battlefields at times. We're often the reenforcements and backup that get's called in whenever someone is trying to get services and supports, whether it's for themselves, or a loved one, or they need to find a resource, or any number of things. On top of that, we're trying to fight for ourselves, whether it's battling our chronic conditions, having to educate people about our disability when we're at our most volnerable, and shouldn't have to, or just trying to live and survive with the services and supports or lack thereof that we have.

Now, I want to pull out the self-care toolbox, (or is it toolboxes?) and show you some of the tools of the trade.

My Self-care Toolbox Has:

1. My fidget spinners:
I use these for a variety of different situations. I play with them when I'm thinking, stressed, angry, or to help pay attention sometimes. I'll even play with one while I'm thinking about something for instance, when I'm creating a flyer for my NFB. Ohio devision's weekly virtual happy hour. There's several different ones that I use, the it depends on what situation I'm in, or what activity I'm doing. Amazon is a great place to find some different fidget toys and spinners.

2. My stuffed animals:
Sometimes, when I need some comfort, I'll snuggle up with one of my stuffed animals that I have. Recently, I took a virtual training that was several hours long, and very intense. During this training, they showed videos and talked about various situations, and some of them were very triggering for me. One of these times, was when they showow a video that brought back memories of a very traumatic event that happened to me, I was able to grab my sloth, and hug it.

3. my books:
Reading has been one of my main coping mechanisms for years! It's great no matter what situation you're in, and it offers an escape hatch.

4. My cats:
I like to start my day off of some chocolate the  Coke on ice, and, spending some time with my cats, and giving them attention. If I can't start my day by seeing them, whether it's due to my schedule, or them not wanting attention at that time, I will carve out time in my day, or wait til the end of my day, and spend some time with them. It's safe to say that if I don't get to see them, my day is incomplete.

5. My bed massager:
This is a recent addition to my toolbox, thanks to an aunt. It has different settings, I can choose which parts are activated, and it has different modes. It even has a heating element. I can't even begin to describe how relaxing it is to lay down on that thing, when laying down for a nap, for instance!

6. Naps
Speaking of laying down for a nap, naps are another tool in my toolbox. It allows me to recharge my batteries, and get a power boost to get through my day, among other things.
7. My support system:
Whenever I'm having a difficult day, need something converted down, or anything else, having people I can lean on is a great comfort. They give me an ear, shoulder, and so much more!

8. My headache wraps:
Whenever I have a bad headache, which is common as I have severe allergy/sinus issues, I'll strap one of those to my head, and, it allows me to get some comfort, and relief. It has also made it possible for me to get through a busy workday, when I can't rest.

9. Music in all its forms:
Music is very important to me, and, I listen to a variety of stuff. I listen to music on the radio, on CD. or using technology such as an Iphone or smart speaker. I'll talk more about that later on. 

10. Braille:
This one is a cornerstone for me. It's my preferred way of accessing things and information, whether it be electronically, or in hardcopy. Plus, I can comprehend it better. It allows me to do things that are a component of self-care, such as eating, because I can heat up something in the microwave since it's brailled.



My Self-care Technology Toolbox:


I know that this is and will be a controversial topic. While tech can be a double-edged sword, it is a tool that can be used as part of your self-care toolbox. In fact, there's so many tools you can use in your self-care tech toolbox, that I decided to make a whole separate toolbox. Also, if you don't like something, such as an app, there's a plethora of others out there to try. If you like multiple apps for different reasons, that's ok too! Also, you can put whatever tools you want in here, including assistive technology! With this in mind, here's the contents of my self-care tech toolbox!


1. My Braille display:
This is a very important one. It allows me to read my books in electronic braille, as well as other things. It also allows me to do things on my Iphone and Ipad, and have greater independence in doing them. It also reduces stress at work, because I can have information in the way I want/need it, and I can write the way I prefer to. I access books from the NLS. and Bookshare, which is another service that offers ebooks in accessible formats.

2. My Amazon Smart Speaker:
Amazon doesn't call these smart speakers for nothing! You can play games, listen to books, set timers, listen to books and podcasts, listen to music, and so much more! For instance, you can set a timer for meditation, and a reminder to meditate. You can listen to a podcast it enjoy, or listen to a book. You can play many kinds of games. The list is endless!
One thing I use is the Sleep Jar skill, which plays different sound affects. My favorite ones to play ste the waterfall or the babbling brooke.

3. My Iphone and Ipad:
I use my Iphone and Ipad to do various things. I use it to read books using the Kindle app, listen to audiobooks using the BARD. Mobile app, from The National Library Service For The Blind And Print Disabled, the Libby app, which allows me to check ebooks and audiobooks from my local library and several other state libraries. Yes, you read that right, getting a library card (or several) is a form of self-care, and it costs you nothing! What better time to do it, since this month is Library card month and self-care month!     

I use them to listen to music, whether through the Spotify app, or the YouTube Music app, or the YouTube, or an app to listen to live radio stations, such as TuneIn.
I also use them to stay connected to my support system. Whether by making a phone call, or using the Zoom platform, email, text messages, or some other means of communication.

                                   



I also use a feature called focus. It allows you to have different notification settings for apps, designate who can and who is forbidden to bug you at certain times of the day, or when you're at certain locations, or when you're in certain apps. You can even have customized lock and home screens that show up when these focuses are activated! You can even automate it, having it start when ever you open your meditation app for instance. If you need time-sensitive notifications, you can even set if those appear too! I have focuses set up with reading, listening to music, listening to podcasts, and another one called meeting, as well as the oldie but goodie do not disturb. My meeting focus is set to only allow notifications from certain apps, allows certain people like close family and friends to call or text, and a couple of other things. All of these focuses are automated, mean that when I open aary of the apps that go with that focus, the focus starts automatically. You even can use these settings in reversed too! To set it up, head over to the settings apps, and choose focus option, and look at what options you have. I think you'll be surprised. Don't worry though, these settings are not set in stone, you can change them at any time. Also, if you have people that you may not necisarily want to give an all-access pass to, but, you want them to be able to get ahold of you in an emergency, you can have them call cack within 3 minutes. When this happens, it will go through, regardless of focus settings.
I also use them to listen to podcasts sometimes, and I use different podcatchers, such as the built-in podcasts app!

You can use them for various other things such as journaling, meditation, and so much more, and some apps, such as YouTube, and TuneIn are stulti-purpose, which means they can be used for different things all in one app!

4. My noise-cancelling headphones:
I have sensory issues, and, they help me block out noises such as fireworks, or they can dull them down. While they don't block everything, they're a godsend. One situation they helped with, which was the original reason we purchased them, is during Independence Day weekend. They were able to block out the sound of the fireworks, and muffle the sound of my radio.
I can have them on, and just block out the noise of the word when I need a break as well.


5. A new addition to my toolbox:

This one is a new addition to my toolbox. I know that this one will be controversial, however, it's an unexpected use-case, and, if used responsibly, I think it could work for some people. The newest addition to my self-care tech toolbox, is AI. more spicifically the Gemini app.
I use it to journal and explein what's going on in my head, and my day, and life. What's nice, is it asks questions back at you sometimes, and you have the opportunity to answer them. While it's not a real person, it does open the lines of communication, and can help explain feelings, thoughts, etc, that you can't put into words. This is especially important for me, because this $ and has always been a struggle for me. This has opened the lines of communication between me and a close friend of mine, whose a vital part of sty support system. What I will do, is show him the prompt, and the response along with it. I'll put it all in a document, and share that file with him. It has helped in more ways than I can explain.


An item that's not part of my toolbox, but, wish it was, and why it's not

Originally, I was not going to put this here, but, because this month is also Suicide prevention and awareness month, along with self-care awareness month, I decided to put this here.
I've been on the hunt for a good mood tracker app that is accessible with VoiceOver, and have not found one yet. This search has been going on for years. The ones I've found either were inaccessible, or they were somewhat accessible, or they required so many workarounds, that it defeated the purpose of the app.

More advocacy needs to be done to make these and other mental health apps accessible for people with disabilities. For instance, having these apps classified as health devices and their compamies classified as healthcare companies. This way, they would fall under the ADA. which has provisions for healthcare of people with disabilities. Or even putting them in the Digital Accessibility Act, or some other form of legislation.



Final Thoughts

I hope this gives you some ideas of what you can put in your self-care toolbox, or different types of toolboxes you can make. What's in your toolbox, do you have more than one? What tools would you recommend adding to self-care toolboxes? What does self-care mean to you, what are some things you think of when you think of or hear the term self-care? Feel free to discuss all of this and anything else related to self-care, and how it relates to advocacy in the comments!